Wargaming Tournament Trip, Part I – Being mistaken for German and questioning Ridley Scott’s judgment

It all started with rude Lufthansa employees.

The girls at the check-in desk (both before and after security) seemed to think my simple check-in questions were designed to antagonize them, and they made no bones about their disgust at my (and other customers’) informational need. One passenger who approached the desk was actually dismissed with a combination eye-roll and “shooing” motion.

You’d think that after the high-profile disaster where one of their pilots intentionally killed a plane load of people, Lufthansa would bend over backwards to keep people from running away in fear. Yes, you would think that, but if you did, you’d be wrong.

I’m happy to say, the staff on the plane was much more professional. Funny thing though; one particular stewardess was determined to believe I was German. At her first German overture (makes it sound like she was handing out hot towels in a horned Wagnerian helmet)

I responded with an awkward ‘Merican “thank you,” which should have tipped her off to my utter ignorance of the German language. It didn’t though, and from then on, she rattled away at me in German at every opportunity. Eventually, I just played along, nodding up-and-down or side-to-side, depending on what she offered. Cart full of duty-free cigarettes? No thanks. Tray of water and juice? Don’t mind if I do!

In between these vaguely embarrassing exchanges, I went forward with my usual international flight orgy of movie-watching. I got in Lincoln, Exodus: Gods and Kings, and The Imitation Game. Really enjoyed the first and third, but what was going ON with the casting of Exodus? Christian Bale as Moses (employing an accent that was 25% Laurence Olivier, 75% Jersey Shore) and Aaron Paul–otherwise known as Jesse on Breaking Bad–as Joshua (Hey, check out the God of Israel, yo!”) and Sigourney Weaver and John Turturro as Egyptians. Did someone lose a bet?

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