G-Star Journal: Day 3, Part 3 – Signage and Drunken Douchebags

No, the title isn’t alliterative but it fits. The party was a bust. I walked to the Paradise Hotel at 9, hungry and hoping there’d be food but there wasn’t any. What I did find however, were a slew of assholes who were already utterly tanked.

Things got rolling when some Eeyore-like dude in line to get into the club came up and said in what he probably thought was a world-weary, sardonic tone, “So what are YOU doing here?” I told him, and then he told me what he was doing here like it was a soul-sucking chore, that he was a business guy but that he’d rather be doing really anything else at the moment. I said I’d come to check out Korean game culture and because I’d never been to Korea and he more or less rolled his eyes and rejoined, “For me, this is WORK.” Uh…OK.

He made several other negative and utterly unappealing comments and I was wondering how the hell I was going to get rid of him and then a loud group of guys behind us caught his interest and he abruptly dumped me and started passing out business cards. Whew. I still wasn’t safe though because ten minutes later when we were allowed in the club and I went to grab a drink, there were two really drunk jerks at the bar, trying to get free drinks when they’d obviously already had their two free drinks.

Douchebaggery crosses all international boundaries.

They kept showing their party tickets to the bartenders, waving their arms, yelling “woop woop!” banging on the bar, waving cash at the staff, and other incredible displays of mental derangement. I just got my gin and tonic and tried to stand somewhere out of the way of the arm-waving. Techno music was booming, a slew of hired beauties started ambling around the place, and just then another inebriated male tapped me and tried to insist I sit down.

Well, I was in no mood to encourage the guy so I refused and I really couldn’t believe I was being hit on when there were so many other likelier targets in the room. The guy said he was a pro gamer (and was annoyed when I thought he’d said “programmer”) – of the Warcraft ilk – and was busily leaning closer and closer and breathing his halitosis on me. When the shoulder-touching began, I abruptly turned and left. All told, I was probably there 15 minutes. Sigh…guess I should’ve listened to my hermit instincts.

I left, walked on the beach a little, saw a full gaggle of feral cats, lost $7 on a slot machine faster than I ever have in my life at the Paradise Casino and grabbed some dinner at an Indian restaurant called Namaste (where I got the best chicken tikka masala I’ve had in a good long while).

Haeundae Beach

So – on to the signage!

As I mentioned in a previous post (and teased in three two previous Day 3 installments), the signage here is a hoot. Here’s a selection of the ones that provided me with the most amusement.

This demonstrates how to lower yourself slowly, ass-first, onto a sharp spike.

Hot dogs - good and good for you!

Guh. Having internet issues. Might have to make this two posts.

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